You won’t find better guides on the Thames than with London RIB Voyages. We pride ourselves on delivering the freshest, funniest tours all courtesy of our hand picked comedy guides – closet history buffs by day, stand up comics and actors by night!

  • Cinelli

    What people say:

    This was brilliant....very professional, the tour guide Stacey was excellent as was the driver Andy...ObblivionLondon, UK

    Meet:

    Stacey Evans

    “The Squirrel”
    Favourite landmark The Tower of London Aka The Squirrel
    Favourite obscure fact A group of hippopotamuses is called a ‘bloat’ When I grow up I want to be AN ADULT :)
    My claim to fame is Tenuous at best My 3 luxury items when working on the river are Champagne, caviar and socks.

    I’m from Manchester and when not clog dancing or working in the local cotton mill I enjoy dining in the finest restaurants in London. I am still surprised that someone will employ me to hang out on a speedboat all day telling people about this amazing city!

    I am hoping to soon have the weathered face of an old sea-dog when I will change my name to Arthur and talk exclusively in vowels.

  • Cinelli

    What people say:

    Treated our dad for his 70th birthday! Little Mike and Ian were the best crew we could have asked for.ThechargesBuckinghamshire, UK

    Meet:

    Mike MacCormac

    ‘Little Mike’
    Favourite landmark The Tower of London Aka Little Mike
    Favourite obscure fact Henry VIII was only married twice! When I grow up I want to be Known as Big Mike
    My claim to fame is Marrying my beautiful wife, Leanne My 3 luxury items when working on the river are A flask of tea, waterproof socks and a SOLID GOLD LIFEJACKET! One of these might be counter-intuitive, can you guess which one?

    In a laboratory at the London Rib Voyages secret research facility an experiment was taking place, their goal was to create the ultimate river tour guide by genetically splicing the cuteness of a puppy, the swimming ability of a fish and the knowledge of the Encyclopaedia Britannica. Unfortunately due to a slight mishap involving an LHC (Little Hadron Collider), a doughnut and a warm tea spoon, the subject was imbued with the cuteness of a fish, the knowledge of a puppy and the swimming ability of the Encyclopaedia Britannica - and Little Mike was created!!

    I tried using my new found abilities to fight crime but I found it quite tiring so I went back to being a guide. I am fully house trained and enjoy being scratched behind the ears…

  • Cinelli

    What people say:

    Great experience. Our guide, Steve, was lively, fun, enthusiastic, and knowledgeable... Tony V.London, UK

    Meet:

    Steve Meo

    ‘Taffy’
    Favourite landmark The Millennium Stadium Aka Taffy
    Favourite obscure fact The buzzard is the only bird that farts When I grow up I want to be Taller
    My claim to fame is My family were on Family Fortunes with Bob Monkhouse My 3 luxury items when working on the river are Green tea and 2 boiled eggs

    I hail from Wales. Although I has lived in London for half my life, I still has the lilting welsh accent, innit. You may recognise me from "Gavin and Stacey", BBC3's "Grownups" or from daytime soap "Doctors".

    My motto when guiding is "never let the truth get in the way of a good story"!!

  • Cinelli

    What people say:

    This was a great experience with the family, from funny facts from Amy, to power speed and music from daveGeorge B.Scarborough, UK

    Meet:

    Amy West

    “Bubbles”
    Favourite landmark Battersea Power Station Aka Bubbles
    Favourite obscure fact More people died in the great beer flood of 1814 than died in the great fire of London! My guilty pleasure Cheese
    My claim to fame is Meeting Jedward on London RIB Voyages My 3 luxury items when working on the river are Coffee, sun cream and spare socks!

    Hi! I'm Amy and I love to show people the BEST that London has to offer from the comfort of our very own SPEEDBOAT! Always up for a laugh - the most important thing to me is that everyone has a great time, and leaves with an even bigger smile than me (if possible)!

    So come on, let's show London how it's done!

  • Cinelli

    What people say:

    Our guide "Tour guide Tom" and driver "Powerboat Paul" were brilliant - fun, friendly and knowledgeable. Highly recommend it !MumoftwoSurrey

    Meet:

    Tom Maller

    “Admiral Maller”
    Favourite landmark The Udderbelly Beer Garden! Aka Admiral Maller
    Favourite obscure fact Killer Whales can kill great white sharks! When I grow up I want to be James Bond/ Batman/ Superman but not Spider man. I don’t like him.
    My Claim to Fame is: I played football with James Mcavoy and he said my chest was like Superman! My 3 luxury items when working on the river are Hair oils, my number and a copy of War and Peace.

    Hi I'm Tom, I'm from the green rolling fields of Gloucestershire where everyone is related. I moved to the big smoke to study at the Drama Centre London as an actor. When I'm not starring in James Bond films I like spending my time entertaining and having a laugh speeding around on the Thames!

    On one of my trips you can expect high energy, a good laugh and maybe a selfie or two when I photograph you and your pals. See you on-board for some speed, sights and serious fun!